“There is something
very deeply comforting and special to know people since childhood. I have one
such person, and just by recalling the connections that one has, leaves a sense
of warmth in the heart. I speak specifically of someone I have known since I
was 7 years old and he was 5 as our parents travelled together from Austria to
South Africa, over half a century ago. All those childhood and teenage years
were often spent together-in the same company, same environment; so that we
have so many common memories, that it is almost like being brother and sister.
His mother was like a second mother to me-and always wished for us to marry.
Well this was never in the cards-I sort of looked upon him as a friend, as
opposed to a would be husband.
Then-about 25 years
ago, through my intervention he and his family have been able to come to
Canada-and is a very successful pharmacist-then about 10 years ago his wife
died and he moved to Arizona. Seldom are there friendships that have been
tested through so many years-knowing everything in detail about each other and
our family-the good the bad and the ugly. We have been friends and very close
as well –romantically, involved on and off many years ago.
It feels very strange
to look back, and witness how many years have passed, and how many things we
have in common. Life indeed has so many strings attached to one in various
ways-and we are so tightly tied to people we love. And, yes we do love each
other-always have through different eras of time. There is something very special about such
deep connections-one can muse over “what and why and what for”, and it is not
easy to dismiss such recollections.
Now-he`s back once
more- wanting to explore the past; and it is causing major complications, for
numerous reasons. What do I do about it? So-yes as this year`s major endowment
is a #1 numerology wise ”new beginnings”-I have many things to think about.
But-the problem is that, old connections run deep-memories connected have very
real affects on one`s heart. It is very
hard to forget one`s youth and those happy days; they haunt one as one revisits
those far away places. Things that have touched us mutually-is something very
special; especially music and specific events that happened in a country, far
away in which we both grew up; that we both call home.
The question now
arises-which way does one allow the situation to proceed; follow one`s head or
one`s heart or one`s soul. Does one simply throw a dice with regard to opening or closing the
door? Does one sacrifice the sure present for something that maybe simply a
illusionary fragment of the past? Is this betrayal of the my present
relationship or just acknowledging the undeniable deep affects of the past that
have developed through the passing of time? Which relationship does one does
one hold sacred and revere? What would hold precedence in this
situation-romantic love or a deep love relationship that held up through almost
a half century?”
My answer to her is,
that I do not know what she should do; for it all depends on where her love
lies-in her heart, head or in her soul.
If in the soul-then she should go with her deep long connection for that is
living from a higher purpose. As for betraying her present relationship-sadly
it is a very real aspect. However –people turning up in one`s life from
the past always is for a reason-and those cards need to be played out no matter what the consequences.
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