A musical thing

One goes through phases in life, phases in time when one seems to question everything-and at times one loses direction.  I am at this point now. Many years ago there was a book titled: ”Passages”-which at the time did not resonate much with me, but now it does.  I now recognize all the passages in my life. These days it feels and seems like –I have been there, done that, have the T-shirt now what? Rather frustrating when the road is so foggy, but I wonder what will appear, as there is always a reason for everything that happens on this journey called life. Alan Watts is right-it is not a journey at all, but a musical thing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBpaUICxEhk

I am debating within me the idea of taking off at least a year in the form of a sabbatical from my work. I need to try to figure out myself-who am I really, as these days I hardly know the question, never mind the answer. In the modern world these days we tend to forget ourselves as we run after the material stuff.  I have done that for far too long.

As I stated in some previous post-I do have a plan and do work the plan these days,-I have changed direction to some degree, but I don`t think it`s enough-for it dosn`t seems to satisfy my heart nor spirit. Something seems to be missing. There is a deep restlessness within me, a need of something that I seem to lack-yet I have no idea what it is. I am searching for something that I feel I need, but cannot say what that is-perhaps I am hoping once I glimpse it, I will recognize it. Maybe it is just the years catching up with me- or a realization that life seems to be like an empty vessel. Some say this is the sign of waking up-of becoming conscious. Stepping out of the old paradigm and into a new one, cutting the chords of old is a difficult process.  A step into a new dimension is not easy-neither is it a pleasant experience, rather foreign to our human nature.

So where does all this leave me-the words that come to mind is “ totally and utterly perplexed”-the only thing making sense this very moment is the soul-soothing music of  Pachelbel`s Canon in D-Major. I am home doing the musical thing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVn2YGvIv0w

Food for thought

A FB post from a friend-I think I will take the Mexican`s philosophy to heart!

American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied, “only a little while. The American then asked why didn’t he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs. The American then asked, “but what do you do with the rest of your time?”
 
“The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siestas with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine, and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life.” The American scoffed, “I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually New York City, where you will run your expanding enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But, how long will this all take?”

To which the American replied, “15 – 20 years.”

“But what then?” Asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said, “That’s the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions!”

“Millions – then what?”

The American said, “Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siestas with your wife Maria, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.”

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