Yes-haven`t been here a while, though I have been here in spirit. Much has transpired, yet still it is the same old, same old--the human soul, spirit is fickle. But this time I have no regrets, no apologies , no self blame. I did nothing-to beget this behavior, thus it has to be -it must be. I certainly did not deserve this -but each his own. Some people are incapable of love, they try but the feelings aren`t there-some neither feel that they are capable to love or be loved.
I honestly thought that once we had a second chance, we would never face this again--as there are no more chances, so we shall carry on in an other dimension which has been pre-determined, but not in this world.
Strange, I hardly think of you these days at all, yet it only has been a few weeks, yet you seem far away almost like a dream--maybe at long last I understand, or rather my heart does that for you words are merely words, not emotions-sad. The thing is that after a while it haunts us--all the would haves should haves and we never find peace.
I now understand the letters to Naomi, every word-and rather well. I didn`t for a long time--for one often read people as one thinks and feels. Those letters should have been a warning--when the same words are repeated to an other person; and oh how many more?? No-a tiger cannot change its stripes.
I feel sorry so very for you, for you shall never have a relationship, neither shall you be loved the way you were-- for to be loved you also have to love your self, be honest and sincere--words are cheap, dime a dozen so it seems from your pen.
But, no matter I have learnt my lesson well this time-my beloved friend.
